Wooden Leg

I think it's about time i tell you about my most embarrassing sexual contact i have ever had!

It was a few years ago now but i remember meeting up with a guy who was actually a little bit older than me. In fact he was a bit older than i would have wanted him to be but i was horny so you know how it is....!?

Anyways, i met up outside his place and after sizing hime up i thought that we might go up to his appartment and have a little......ummmm fun. Now remember i was exceptionally horny that day and under usual circumstances i would not have gone there but as i have said before, i was horny.

We get up to his appartment. By this time im beginning to come to my senses and woder why i am anywhere near this guy but he seems to be very keen and before i can say no he starts getting undressed. I am meanwhile trying to rack my brain to find an excuse to leave. I see him take his shirt off. I then remember turning around to do something and then i look back at him to see him bending over and doing something to his leg. Now the lighting wasnt that good so the room was kind of darkish. His figure was almost a sihouette. Then i got the shock of my life! His leg just fell off and hit the floor with a thud. He fell on to the bed. My automatic reaction was to head for the light switch. You can just imagine, i almost packed my pants. Some guys leg had just fallen off!!! When i got the light on all became clear, there was this guy laying on the bed totally naked with one leg. On the floor was this WOODEN LEG. Enough was enough i had to get out of there and fast, made my excuses with the only excuse that i KNEW would get me out of there without hurting his feelings. I said i was straight!

Now i might hear you ask how did you not notice that he had a wooden leg? Well, he had a slight limp that i thought might be due to an injury and second he didnt mention it on his gaydar profile or in his e-mails!

You know how it is. Descibe yourself. 6 inches uncut, goodlooking, white euro.....but nothing about a wooden leg. I dont know about you guys but it is only polite to prepare someone for that kind of thing especially if you are going to have a bit of.....nookie with them! I could have got myself into a bit of trouble if i had said i'd wanted to spread his LEG.

So, Moral of this story: Make sure a guy tells you everything about himself before you meet them. That way you dont get any SURPRISES.

PS: I dont have anything against people who are physically impaired. I just need to know about it in order to save embarrassment and to work out a good position!

Revamp

Ok guys, i think its about time to revamp my blog!

Over the next few weeks i am going to be talking about one of the few things that make me tick. That is mens bodies! Fat ones, skinny ones, muscley ones, old ones, young ones, hairy ones, smooth ones,we all have our preferences.

The craze for men over the last few years has been for men to shave their chests. Nothing worse than snuggling up to a guy with bristles as sharp as razors themselves. You just finish a night of passion to find out that you are red with scratches. I must admit i dont shave my chest because im naturally smooth but to those hairy guys that do shave their chests, do you find the stubble irritates your skin as it rubs on your clothes? Are their other ways to remove the hair without that stubble.

Boys boys boys, if you have to get rid of that hot chest hair it might be good to wax. I remember a few years ago when i was invited back to a guys place for dinner (which inevitably led to a night of passion) we hopped naked into bed and he rubbed his legs up and down mine. He had obviously shaved his legs a day or two before. I was in agony as his spines ripped into me. I dont think he ever realised how painful that night was for me but he must have thought i was exceptionally acrobatic in the sack as i tried every position and manouevre in order to avoid those stubbly legs. The poor lad even gave me his phone number to ring him for another session the next night. Needless to say, i didnt call not because of rudeness but purely to RECOVER and rub in some soothing cream (needless to say it wouldnt be his :S

Buskers Festival

This week has been the World Buskers Festival here in Christchurch. It is basically a group of performers from all over the world who converge on our New Zealand city to perform in the city streets. We in turn give a small donation if we enjoy their performance. It's been held in Christchurch for the last few years with performers this year coming from USA, Canada, Netherlands, UK, Germany, Australia and New Zealand.

The city has been awash with visitors, so much so that my local Starbucks has had performers performing across the road from it and each time i have been to Starbucks i have struggled to find a seat. The last day of the event is tomorrow. Im not a big fan of watching street entertainment but i have stopped for a short time at some of the events and have been impressed.

Has anyone ever tryed street performing for cash? I dont mean being a hooker :)

Weather Report

After two more days of temperatures hitting 30c and 32c today has cooled right down with clouds and and drizzle. I have been in shorts for the last 4 weeks but now i have to dig up some pants in order to go to town to do a few chores. Im going to have to have to go and get my regular starbucks coffee as well. I have to keep the big corps happy.

Lov ya.

Happy New Year 2008

First, Happy New Year 2008.

Second, Im sorry for not posting since Christmas but i have been away down South for a few weeks on a camping holiday. The weather was great but a little too hot in places. I spent a few days camping by a large lake surrounded by mountains. Their were helicopters and sea planes taking off every few minutes and it was pretty entertaining watching them land and take off.

I spent new years day in the city of Dunedin. The fireworks at the stroke of midnight were grear and the weather remained pleasantly warm throughout. The evenings street entertainment was pretty good too with two live bands performing in the city centre. They were well organised open air events and they were free. We met lots of wonderful people who were also holidaying including many from overseas. All had their stories to tell. The majority of people we spoke too were from Germany, Netherlands, Israel, and South Africa. All spoke of the differnces between their countries and ours. I was pretty surprised at how few Americans were around this year. My guessing is that Americans might not do as much camping when overseas compared to other nationalities but i may be wrong.

Now it is back to the reality of everyday life and work. It's amazing how reality kicks back in so quickly. The good weather is still continuing and the nice long light evenings give a certain vibrancy. I have taken the opportunity to take my evening strolls to town and grab a Starbucks and just watch the hot guys pass by. Oh this is the life.....